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i wish someone loved me"Broken hearts aren't easily fixed"
That's my motto for this horrid world
Its transformed me into this shell
With a dark black void inside.
I stare silently ahead, the faces blur together.
I look in the mirror, a pair of hollow eyes stare back
Fate stands next to me whispering,
"Your nothing. Nothing, nothing at all. Pathetic"
It echos in my ears haunting me while I sleep
It scratches my mind when I'm wide awake.
Pain has no affect on me anymore.
Its not the physical pain that matters anymore.
My fathers screams deafen me.
My moms ripped clothes blind me.
My brothers hands cripples me.
My sisters mouth silences me.
My insides scream for a release.
My outside exterior is silent.
I grasp at reality,
hoping I will be caught.
As it looks, I'm not caught.
But never fear I feel no pain.
A sigh escapes my lips.
My eyelids close slowly.
My last thought is quite simple.
Really not that big.
Its just one little sentence
"i wished someone cared about me,
I wish someone loved me"
ListenCan you hear me?
It's me the girl you see smiling everyday
Always laughing and joking around with the people who are around me
In hopes that they won't figure out my secret.
I'm hear calling you
Just wanting to talk and hear your deep voice
Take me away from here in this place I call home.
You told me I can call you whenever I wanted to talk
For your one of the boys who listens to me
And actually cares to help me from any problems I have
For I won't have to face them alone.
I close my eyes as I listen to you
Telling me that everything will be alright
And you will be here by my side soon
That tears start to escape from my eyes
Waiting to be wiped away when you get here.
If there is anything I want to tell you now before you come
It's that I love you with all my heart
And I thank you for always being here for me.
Fake SmileWhat is a smile?
The first thing many people would say is that it represents happiness.
But what if I told you it was the complete opposite.
How am I suppose to expect others to accept me if I can't even accept myself?
I struggle every day trying to hide all my flaws.
But it's only natural for everyone to have some.
The only thing I can do to make myself look better in the face of others is to smile.
What is this feeling burning deeply within my heart?
Is it jealousy, hate, sorrow, despair or all of them combined?
I feel like my soul is chained away somewhere, struggling to brake free.
And I can't seem to find happiness in my life.
I try to hide it with a smile, but only I know that it's not real.
What do I do if I have no hope for the future?
Everything I've ever believed in turned out to be a lie.
What's stopping me from going crazy?
All I can do is get my composure back and put my game face on.
My face cannot show any emotion,
So I shall smile once again and again, and again and the
ThornsA rose has been grown
And with it came the thorns.
They grew to protect the rose
From any danger that would come and destroy it.
If anyone tried to pick this beautiful creation
They would pop out
Stopping them threw a little pinch.
Some say they are a monster
Causing people to bleed.
But they only do what they do,
Because it's their job
To protect this beautiful creation
Just like how a parent would protect their child.
Some thorns blend in the stem
So that they can stay and continue their job.
While others stand out
In hopes that no one will dare come near
The innocent beauty.
Once the sun has fallen
And the moon has come out to shine.
The thorns are still on patrol
Making sure their little prize position
Is safe until the day
When it's time for the both of them to say goodbye.
Please Don't Go...I can feel the coldness slowly taking you away from me
As you lie here so still on the white snow.
My arms rap around you so tight
As tears start to roll down my pale face.
All that's going through my head right now
Is why I couldn't be here sooner?
Would I have stopped this from all happening?
I rest my head gently on your chest
Hearing but the littlest hart beat
That is giving me hope that you will be alright.
As I listen I feel your arms start to rap around me
Pulling me closer to you.
You start to whisper in my ear saying
"I'm sorry please remember that I love you "
As you kiss my cheek so softly after.
I can't stop hugging you
For I never want you to leave.
Your heart has stopped beating
And your arms have let go of each other
Falling so slow to the white ground.
From a distance I hear an ambulance coming
And start to hear voices of people
But before I let go of you
I whisper softly in your ear saying
"One day we will be together again love."
Cold NightsCold Nights
A clear night stretches in the sky
With only my eyes to see
As my body lays still
In the pure white snow.
There’s nothing for me to feel
For the coldest feelings have come
And will never go away.
My vision starts to get a little fuzzy
As I look up to the sky
Seeing the life that shines so bright
In that clear night sky.
As every minute passes
My vision gets worse and worse
Along with the cold swallowing my body whole.
I ask myself, is this it?
Is this real? Fake?
Has my presence in this world come to its end so soon?
Nothing makes sense to me anymore.
A gust of wind comes my way
Brushing against me,
Yet it feels like it’s taking me away
Away to a place were my questions will be answered.
Dreams and RealityAlone in the evening solitude she waits.
Her small, fragile form eagerly ready for him.
He- the lord of the shadows;
the one who keeps her company.
He steps into her mind.
His silver smile cutting through the shadows-
A blissful dagger in the darkness of her soul.
He clutches her to his body,
Lightly pressing her lonely lips to his.
Shyly she smiles whilst his hands caress her face.
"I love you" says the girl.
He smirks at her.
"You know I'm not real my dear" says he
She sighs "It's yet another dream isn't it?"
The man nods and melts away into the shadows,
And she, is left alone,
in a solemn embrace with loneliness.
The only embrace she's ever known...
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Lilyas has dedicated herself to making our community a brighter place with her vibrant artwork and infectious enthusiasm for interacting with others in our community. It has certainly paid off, as many deviants flock to her page on a daily basis to let her know how much of an inspiration she is. We absolutely agree, and couldn't let all that hard work go without recognition, so it's with great pride that we bestow the Deviousness Award for March 2014, to ... Read More